Communing

Tuesday night we talked... all of us. A group of ten, from age 19 to early 40's. Wildly different personalities and backgrounds. But a unifying desire to be real, to seek more, to be present, to use words to convey our deepest core while wanting so much more than words. Talk of action. "This faith has got to have wheels if it's going to be worth anything at all."

Dan and I have prayed, waited, and hoped. My vision has been clear for years. It has been directed and specific for this very thing. I can't even express how much I have known this is what I and all of us need and have held it so clearly in my sights as to almost taste it. Ever since I moved to San Fran the vision has been building. Here, four years later, it is unfolding.

Arts Night was a big step over a year ago now. It still packs them in. Now we begin to gather even more regularly and consistently - with more intentionality.

We did not know how it would go. We both had apathy cloaking our fear before everyone came on Tuesday. But we prayed for half an hour, releasing it all back to God and the night was... beyond our hopes even. Beautiful and free.

I know not what led me to the Nouwen book, but I spent two hours two weeks ago writing favorite notes from the first part of "Reaching Out". I feared I emailed it out into the void with others probably wondering why I was so damn wordy and pretentious. But then multiple people call or email telling me that the words were JUST what they needed to hear; one said she printed them up, carried them with her all week and danced with eagerness every time she read over them; others said they had to read over them to get them but found them very piercing. Then when we gathered, conversation flowed and acquaintances and strangers poured out a piece of their souls. I saw parts of friends I had never seen before and heard words of wisdom that are staying with me like a mantra in the back of my head. We held hands and prayed at the end, simple, straightforward, all reverent and hushed in the knowledge of the depths we had just plumbed with one another.

This is communing. This is community. It is humble in beginning and the results and coming steps are out of our control. But I know God sees the secret desire of my heart and is already responding with more glory than I could even ask for. Goodness is pouring out.

Afterwards, Dan kissed me over and over, saying he was so proud of me and thanked God we were on the same team. I think we make a great one, by the grace of God. May the rest flow from beyond our meager capabilities and continue to surprise us all.